


Letter From The Dead

by SootheYourBoobs



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Grief/Mourning, Grieving Thor, Letters, Loki Pretending to be Odin, Other, Post Loki's "Death", Sentimental, Sentimental Loki, Teasing, Thor: The Dark World, as always, loki is a little shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-10
Updated: 2017-11-10
Packaged: 2019-01-31 13:39:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12683019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SootheYourBoobs/pseuds/SootheYourBoobs
Summary: After Loki's death, Thor returns to Asgard. After working to clearing the mess in Loki's former cell, he comes across what appears to be a letter from Loki, addressed to him.





	Letter From The Dead

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so I know Loki would probably NEVER write a letter to Thor, explaining himself and whatnot, because he's not the kind for Sentiment, but pretend for once, he does. But it still ends with him being a little shit, like always, but I love the little fucker.

After the battle at Svartalfheim, Thor returned to Asgard. His heart was full of grief at the loss of his brother, Loki. He prays Loki may somehow find peace, but also wishes he could have his brother back.

He decided since Mother was dead, as well as Loki, that he should be the one to clear his things out of his cell. He wasn't sure if his things which lie scattered and broken about the space was a trick, but he though he would try anyways.

Some of the guards offered assistance, but he told them he could handle it. He spent many days crying, his heart aching, and cold. While he searched and gathered for all his books, he came across one stuffed under a chair.

He looked at it, figuring Loki would've put some sort of charm on it to ward off unwanted viewers, but surprisingly, he opened it with ease. As soon as he opened it, a folded up piece of parchment fell out, landing to the floor at his feet. He picked it up, and discovered his name written on the side, in Loki's beautiful handwriting, and began to read.

_**@.@** _

_**Thor,** _

_**If you ever come across this, well, then that means I may be finally dead. I never thought I would ever write a letter to you. YOU of all people. Knowing all that I've done, this almost seems more insane than any of my other strenuous pursuits, and that's saying something.** _

_**I found myself bored one day while trapped in this blasted cell, so, I thought I'd write out a letter. Originally, it was only for entertainment purposes, but then, something in me decided to create a real letter.** _

_**I assume you, as well as everyone else on Asgard, would like to know the reasoning behind my madness, but I've decided, I would only allow you the satisfaction of getting your answer.** _

_**Though you may not like what I have to say, this letter will contain nothing but the truth, for once. So I've decided to, how you say, dumb things down, so your very limited mind and thinking, can possibly come to comprehend some of mine, but I wouldn't want you to strain yourself.** _

_**I know our relationship as brothers is pretty much, dissolved. I know I've caused you, and so many others, nothing but pain and suffering. And all the while, I hid mine, ever so brilliantly...Even after Mother was killed. Even before I fell from the Bifrost, and even before I went mad and the old me died, I was dealing with my own pain.** _

_**Like I told you back on Midgard, I was nothing but your shadow. Everyone adored you, loved you, noticed you. They treated you like you were the best thing to ever be created. But you were arrogant, reckless, and utterly stupid.  You still sort of are, But everyone loved you, and still does.** _

_**To me, I always thought of you as the Sun, while I was the moon. You shined brighter, while I did not. For the longest time, I only assumed Mother was the only one who truly loved me. I'm sure I was just being paranoid, and had knew you loved me as well, but I couldn't see it.**_

_**I thought the world of her, and whether you believe it or not, I thought the world of you as well. You and Mother were all that I truly cared for, and I tried with Odin, but yet...He favored the mighty Thor more.** _

_**I always felt like the shadow. The outsider. While we attacked Jötunheim, one of the Frost Giants touched me. Instead of being hurt from their touch, the skin where the creature had touched me, turned blue. I knew then that I further stood out from all of you, and that something was very very wrong.**_

_**I had remembered when we were boys and Odin told us about the Frost Giants, that you said you couldn't wait to crush them, crush all the monsters, just like Father once did. I knew then that I had to hide what had happened, for I feared you would see me as a monster, and kill me.** _

_**From that point, I couldn't get that out of my mind, it became the only thing I could think about then. And my worst fears were confirmed when Odin told me who I really was.**_

_**That I was not of Asgard at all, and that he thought of me as a tool for peace between Asgard and Jötunheim. He claims he changed his mind, but I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't. I never felt so betrayed in my existence, and I was the reason Odin fell into his slumber.** _

_**After he fell asleep, I began to lose myself, lose my mind. I took the throne and eventually came to the conclusion that if I destroyed Jötunheim, destroyed the First Giants, the monsters, that I wouldn't be one of them. But as you and I both know, I didn't succeed. But like I told you, I never truly wanted the throne, to Hel with the blasted throne, all I wanted was to be your equal...I guess that doesn't matter anymore, for that would never happen.** _

_**Before I came to Midgard and before the Chitauri followed, I went through some...Experiences, ones that I will not disclose in this letter. I may be a monster, but I would not dare want to relive the horrors I've went through with that, in this letter. But know that after the Bifrost, the old brother you once knew, was gone forever, and something worse came out. And with the scepter the leader of the Chitauri granted me, I felt the powers of it flowing through my veins, and only further amplified the monster you and all others, saw then.**_

_**It's power, as you and your Avenger friends witnessed, is a force to be reckoned with. It can find the very worst in anyone it comes into contact with, and make it stronger. It almost worked with Banner, since his bad side is the monster he's cursed to be. I found that part quite funny, actually.** _

_**You may not know this, but before I stabbed you, while you shook me and made me see what I had done, I had a single moment of clarity. A single moment, and then it was gone, and I stabbed you. That was mainly the scepter's doing. It was out of my reach, but it's influence still poisoned me. So for that, I am sorry. Since I've been kept away from my scepter, I can slowly feel it's poison withdrawing from me, which actually relieves me.**_

_**I loathe you. I envied you, I absolutely despise you with all that I am, I hope you know that well...Though you will never hear me say it to your face, well, I can't do that now, can I? But though you are the biggest idiot in the entire universe, and I hate you, and though I've continued to hurt and betray you, your loss just might break my tainted, blackened little heart.** _

_**This whole idea of a letter, is still insane. I shouldn't be writing to you, why would I write to you?! You, a moronic barbarian whose could never even come close to ever grasping all of what goes on in my mind, how I feel, or any of the horror's that plague every bit of my rotted soul. And yet, here I am, writing a silly sentimental little letter, for you. Thor Odinson, the mighty God of Thunder, future Oaf King of Asgard...I really am insane then.** _

_**Now that I've given somewhat of a decent explanation for why I have come to do what I've done, and I hope you can understand why I've become this way...I do feel responsible for Mother's death, and for that, my soul can rot in the bowels of Hel.** _

_**I know I've hurt you. I've betrayed you and everything I held dear to my heart, and I understand if you never forgive me for what I've done. I wish you could trust me, I don't always enjoy deceiving. I guess it's part of my nature, but no matter. Part of me wishes there was a way for me to make it up to you, fix all I've broken, and maybe become your brother again if we survive this. But again, I understand if it's too late, which I'm sure it is.** _

_**Alright, enough sentiment, before I rip this to pieces. Do me a favor, and not tell a soul what you've read. Can't go around ruining my good name by saying I've turned soft, I've got a reputation to uphold. Do what you wish to this letter, tear it up, burn it, whatever. Watch over the Nine Realms, and take care of yourself, you Oaf.** _

_**Sincerely,** _

_**Loki** _

_**@.@** _

Reading this letter, Thor couldn't help but smile. He could almost hear his brother's voice as he read it. But just imagining the horror's Loki must have gone through, made tears pool in his eyes. He quickly wiped them away before anyone could see, and sighed. He muttered "Don't worry, Loki. Your secrets safe with me." Before going back to work.

_**@.@** _

From the throne, Loki heard the words Thor had uttered, using his powers to listen in. Masked as Odin, he knew the blond would never suspect his return, or that he has taken the throne and sent Odin elsewhere. He's sure the Oaf had found his little letter, and for a moment, he let a small smile spread across his face before slipping back into character.


End file.
